Being adventurous as kids is a force of nature. You just can't help but be precocious. Everything is a new excitement, and everywhere can present an opportunity for a lasting memory. And speaking of which, though I do admit that most of my memories are incomplete at best, there are those that are as whole as a fresh apple. And one such memory involves my once innate curiosity, and a place in which I'd experience my first real moment of panic.
Where we lived on list, our house was situated mere yards from a very large storm drain. Well, it was large to me as a little kid. I'm quite sure it was -and is- standard size. But when you're a seven-year old, it's roughly the size of a small cavern and deep enough to spark thoughts of hidden treasure and high adventure only read about in Jules Verne novels. It quickly became a source of fascination for my friends and I. We knew that any one of us individually was never going to get into it. The grate was solid iron and weighed more than the three of us put together. But, if we had a fourth... if only Jeff, Kurt, and I could find a kid with more strength, more leverage; possibly older and smarter about these things, we just might be able to crack the seal and climb in. Fortunately for us, we knew of someone. Jamie Chenery. Yep, the brother of the girl I'd kissed for my very first time. He was still a great friend, and was the real influence on my love of all things Star Wars. But that's another story, too.
So, on one particularly steamy summer afternoon, I gathered the wrecking crew. And we discovered right away that Jamie had one brilliant idea after another. The first of which was to dig out the seam of the storm grate where it met the iron frame. We all knew that somehow this thing had be opened when workers needed to get into it, we'd seen it done a few times when it got too clogged with leaves and yard debris. So Jeff, Kurt, and I gathered tools that could easily fit in the half-inch gap that ran the length of the iron. I borrowed an old butter knife, even going so far as to tell my parents what I was up to. Oddly, they only laughed knowing full well that I was going to get that grate up as much as I was going to grow up to be Superman. I'd show them...
We spent the better part of three full afternoons excavating that impermeable rectangle, until we finally had every grain of dirt cleaned from its perimeter. It was beautiful; not only did it look like it had just been laid into place for the first time, but it actually jiggled when we shook it like some kind of misshaped molar of some mythical, metal beast. The time had come for it to separate from its mooring. We gathered around it, each of us wondering if even with our combined strength we'd be able to even budge it... but waiting around wasn't accomplishing anything. So we each curled our fingers under a section of the grate, and put our backs into it.
Surprisingly, it came away a little easier than we'd imagined. With a cacophonous grind, the lid to the storm drain pulled free. Don't let the description fool you: it was definitely heavy. And immediately we could feel the full weight on our fingers; it felt like they were being yanked out by the knuckles. So we only shifted it far enough off the actual drain for us to push it the rest of the way. We slid it free from the lip, and set it right next to it. And then we all gazed into the gaping maw like we had just uncovered the secret tomb of some long-forgotten Pharaoh.
It was pretty dry down there, since it hadn't rained in a week or so, so it was easy to spot leaves, bits of dandelions and sticks, and little toys we'd all lost down there a time or two: action figures attached to parachutes, Matchbox cars, jacks, part of a foam airplane... it was treasure and it was ours. But, we were at a loss because it became very obvious really quickly that someone was going to have to go down there and retrieve them. Fortunately, the one real inarguable test for four boys to determine who was going to drop six feet into a hole was Rock/Paper/Scissors. We played... I lost.
It was time for me to test my mettle. Oh, I was scared. I was even trying to back out of it by staring at my house in the feeble attempt to draw one of my parents out just with the power of my mind. It didn't work. I was stuck and locked into an agreement bestowed upon me by a stupid game of chance. So, I sucked it up, and let my three friends slowly lower me in by my arms. And down I went into a cave a child was never meant to explore.
At first, everything seemed alright. I grabbed the little toy treasures and tossed them up out of the drain. I even discovered a few other bits of detritus that had collected under the leaves and twigs. But eventually, it got overwhelmingly and oppressively hot. I began to sweat like I'd committed a crime, and I wanted nothing more than to be lifted right back out. So I yelled up at my friends that Id had enough and the fun was no longer fun. But all I got in return was deafening silence. Apparently, my 'friends' had run off, probably laughing like lunatics as they did so. It was then that I really decided it was high time to panic hysterically and scream my terrified head off. and that's exactly what I did.
What was likely only a few minutes felt like hours as I stood in that sweltering tomb bellowing till I was horse. Finally, my dad came running out and followed the sound of my voice to the storm drain. The look on his face was an amalgam of both utter surprise and confused anger. It took him all of two minutes to kneel, extend his arms, and pluck me out, but it was long enough for him to express his concern, ire, and fear that any number of horrible things could have happened to me. Although he was weirdly impressed that we were able to get the lid off in the first place. The two of us spent another minute resealing the drain, and went inside. And even though the story got a burst of shock from my mom, I didn't really get into trouble. Well, other than not being able to play with any of the three boys for a week. I'd say that was punishment enough for the anguish I had to go through.
Later, my friends admitted that they were just down the street laughing and would have returned in a few minutes after I'd suffered sufficiently, but they'd run off when my dad came outside. Did I learn a lesson? Well, I never went into another storm drain, if that's what you mean. But by no means did that little adventure stop me from doing vastly stupider things. Luckily, you'll eventually hear about them, too.
Where we lived on list, our house was situated mere yards from a very large storm drain. Well, it was large to me as a little kid. I'm quite sure it was -and is- standard size. But when you're a seven-year old, it's roughly the size of a small cavern and deep enough to spark thoughts of hidden treasure and high adventure only read about in Jules Verne novels. It quickly became a source of fascination for my friends and I. We knew that any one of us individually was never going to get into it. The grate was solid iron and weighed more than the three of us put together. But, if we had a fourth... if only Jeff, Kurt, and I could find a kid with more strength, more leverage; possibly older and smarter about these things, we just might be able to crack the seal and climb in. Fortunately for us, we knew of someone. Jamie Chenery. Yep, the brother of the girl I'd kissed for my very first time. He was still a great friend, and was the real influence on my love of all things Star Wars. But that's another story, too.
So, on one particularly steamy summer afternoon, I gathered the wrecking crew. And we discovered right away that Jamie had one brilliant idea after another. The first of which was to dig out the seam of the storm grate where it met the iron frame. We all knew that somehow this thing had be opened when workers needed to get into it, we'd seen it done a few times when it got too clogged with leaves and yard debris. So Jeff, Kurt, and I gathered tools that could easily fit in the half-inch gap that ran the length of the iron. I borrowed an old butter knife, even going so far as to tell my parents what I was up to. Oddly, they only laughed knowing full well that I was going to get that grate up as much as I was going to grow up to be Superman. I'd show them...
We spent the better part of three full afternoons excavating that impermeable rectangle, until we finally had every grain of dirt cleaned from its perimeter. It was beautiful; not only did it look like it had just been laid into place for the first time, but it actually jiggled when we shook it like some kind of misshaped molar of some mythical, metal beast. The time had come for it to separate from its mooring. We gathered around it, each of us wondering if even with our combined strength we'd be able to even budge it... but waiting around wasn't accomplishing anything. So we each curled our fingers under a section of the grate, and put our backs into it.
Surprisingly, it came away a little easier than we'd imagined. With a cacophonous grind, the lid to the storm drain pulled free. Don't let the description fool you: it was definitely heavy. And immediately we could feel the full weight on our fingers; it felt like they were being yanked out by the knuckles. So we only shifted it far enough off the actual drain for us to push it the rest of the way. We slid it free from the lip, and set it right next to it. And then we all gazed into the gaping maw like we had just uncovered the secret tomb of some long-forgotten Pharaoh.
It was pretty dry down there, since it hadn't rained in a week or so, so it was easy to spot leaves, bits of dandelions and sticks, and little toys we'd all lost down there a time or two: action figures attached to parachutes, Matchbox cars, jacks, part of a foam airplane... it was treasure and it was ours. But, we were at a loss because it became very obvious really quickly that someone was going to have to go down there and retrieve them. Fortunately, the one real inarguable test for four boys to determine who was going to drop six feet into a hole was Rock/Paper/Scissors. We played... I lost.
It was time for me to test my mettle. Oh, I was scared. I was even trying to back out of it by staring at my house in the feeble attempt to draw one of my parents out just with the power of my mind. It didn't work. I was stuck and locked into an agreement bestowed upon me by a stupid game of chance. So, I sucked it up, and let my three friends slowly lower me in by my arms. And down I went into a cave a child was never meant to explore.
At first, everything seemed alright. I grabbed the little toy treasures and tossed them up out of the drain. I even discovered a few other bits of detritus that had collected under the leaves and twigs. But eventually, it got overwhelmingly and oppressively hot. I began to sweat like I'd committed a crime, and I wanted nothing more than to be lifted right back out. So I yelled up at my friends that Id had enough and the fun was no longer fun. But all I got in return was deafening silence. Apparently, my 'friends' had run off, probably laughing like lunatics as they did so. It was then that I really decided it was high time to panic hysterically and scream my terrified head off. and that's exactly what I did.
What was likely only a few minutes felt like hours as I stood in that sweltering tomb bellowing till I was horse. Finally, my dad came running out and followed the sound of my voice to the storm drain. The look on his face was an amalgam of both utter surprise and confused anger. It took him all of two minutes to kneel, extend his arms, and pluck me out, but it was long enough for him to express his concern, ire, and fear that any number of horrible things could have happened to me. Although he was weirdly impressed that we were able to get the lid off in the first place. The two of us spent another minute resealing the drain, and went inside. And even though the story got a burst of shock from my mom, I didn't really get into trouble. Well, other than not being able to play with any of the three boys for a week. I'd say that was punishment enough for the anguish I had to go through.
Later, my friends admitted that they were just down the street laughing and would have returned in a few minutes after I'd suffered sufficiently, but they'd run off when my dad came outside. Did I learn a lesson? Well, I never went into another storm drain, if that's what you mean. But by no means did that little adventure stop me from doing vastly stupider things. Luckily, you'll eventually hear about them, too.
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